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5 Things I Learned As I Wait for “The One”

In Relationships
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I haven’t posted anything for a while because I thought that the Lord wanted me to keep some of my everyday affairs private and to only share them with people I get to actually talk to everyday. But now, I think it’s the time to speak up again. Especially that lately, the Lord has been touching a part of me I’ve always held dear.

God has been teaching me a lot about waiting for “the one”.

Every now and then, I look at some men who have passion in discipling other men, extraordinary God-inspired knowledge and wisdom about life, faith and dependence on the Spirit, with such respect and admiration. However, it is seldom (haha, never actually) that I develop romantic feelings for someone, to the point that I would actually ask God if the guy is “the one”, no matter how he seem to fit all the traits I wanted in a guy. I have learned to be on guard when talking/thinking about matters of the heart, especially that I have experienced before pursuing a relationship short of God’s guidance……

…….and it was painful.

It left me miserable. Having my broken heart mended by my sweet Redeemer, I learned how not to “fall in love” with someone too easily, as I become more and more contented with having Jesus as my Lover. If my 12-year-old self would be seeing me today, she would be amazed at how God has changed my heart, as it would have been very difficult not to develop feelings for my brothers in Christ (since a lot of them are amazing gentlemen allowing God to mold them into Christ-likeness).

But lately, my heart is being awakened by God’s promise of a mate whom He has prepared (and is still preparing) to be my lifelong partner in serving Him and His people. If that is because I am soon to meet him (or have already met him), is something I’ve yet known.

I have never felt this way since I started following Jesus in 2009. I have never felt this expectant that He will send someone along my way, and that it would be the best love story ever written (that has 3 characters – me, him, and the actual star of the story, Jesus), considering my peculiarities . Since 2 weeks ago, I am being compelled to pray for him, the man of God waiting on the other side, whoever he is. I am glad that it is not because of the nearing February 14 phenomenon, for I have always been unaffected by it as I believe that in His perfect time, I will be able to experience the most romantic gestures I would ever know from the right man. February 14 or any other date in the calendar would not even matter, because we would share a timeless and piercing love, manifested in every day, and which can only come from its Author.

I do not know why this has been God’s leading lately, but I have been learning a lot in this:

1. Wait in faith

I have been telling God that I did not want to develop any romantic feelings for anyone without any assurance. As I reflect on this, I have realized that it was difficult for me to entertain a God-inspired admiration for someone, if there is no physical, “tangible” proof that he liked me too. Ang sabi ko kay Lord, wag na Niya kong hayaang magka-feelings. Takot akong masaktan. Pano kung di niya ko gusto? He’s way too out of my league!

But, is it possible that God wants me to just trust Him in this? After all, it would not be me, or my physical attributes, or my smile, or any pagpapa-cute, or anything I do, that will turn this noble knight to notice me. I just know that if it would be God Himself who whispers in this knight’s ear to look at this meek maiden, to pray for her to be his lifetime partner, to make the first move on His go signal, he would not have the guts to resist. HAHA!

2. Focus on God

Simply said, if looking for a mate supersedes my desiring to see the Lord in every detail in my life, I am not yet ready to have one. The Gift of being able to meet with God every day, any time of the day, should be honored higher than soon meeting the man He made for me. I am realizing that entertaining the thought about this highly anticipated mate the Lord more often than I should would only stress me out. I should meditate on God’s Word and pray as these thoughts come across my mind, and surrender it to God’s feet. There are a lot more other things to pray for and to meditate on than that!

3. Pray for a partner more passionate for God than for you

It is interesting how God has placed in my heart the growing desire to have the privilege to shepherd a church so they would lead Jesus-centered lives and would go to the ends of the earth, doing the great commission. And how wonderful it would be to have a partner who shares the same desire! A mate who is more passionate for me than for God would never be fully satisfied, and we would just end up frustrating each other as our needs are left short of being fulfilled. But a mate who is more passionate for God would be delighting in Him and would have a bottomless supply of joy!

Grabe! Naiimagine ko na yung mga ngiti namin at mutual kilig habang pinag-uusapan yung miracles ni Lord sa ministries namin, habang iniisa-isa yung victories ni Lord sa mga naging obstacles, habang napapailing sa paghanga sa laki ng transformations na nagawa ni Lord sa mga kaluluwang nakikilala namin………. NAKAKAKILIG! <3

4. Pursue Commitment

I am recognizing that I still have a lot to learn about commitment. I am a kind of person who pours in everything she has onto whatever she has devoted her heart into. But I have realized that this is all too superficial, too easy to break, too emotion-dependent, if not motivated by the Holy Spirit. As I learn everyday how to commit everything to the Lord, and how to depend on the Holy Spirit in everything I do, I also learn how to submit every little thing in my life to Him, including something as little as having a crush on someone. All these, as I submit myself to learn how to have Spirit-driven commitment in the bigger things.

5. Let go of your plans and exchange them for God’s will

Based on experience, the Lord have always done something far more amazing, far more creative, far grander than how I have ever imagined them. I should always be willing to let go of all the things I might have in mind, to make space for the better things the Lord has prepared for me. His will revealed to me little by little as I surrender every desire, every dream, every though, in prayer every single day.


Waiting can be such a chore.

But when you see it as a way to encounter God,

to learn more about depending on Him,

to know deeper the character of God,

you would see that waiting can be a beautiful thing.


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